Do grandparents have rights to see children?

27 November 2024

Becoming a grandparent is certainly a milestone, and a very special one at that. For many, it’s a chance to enjoy the best parts of parenting without the daily responsibilities. This can mean weekend visits, babysitting duties, trips to the library and feeding the ducks. Yet, life doesn’t always follow the ideal script.


Even in the best of times, families are complex. Throw in the mix of a busy life, work, relationship breakdowns, and you see how fragile the ecosystem of a family truly is and how communication with one another can be stretched to breaking point. When families fall out, the ripple effect goes beyond the main players and impacts the dynamics of the whole family.


For grandparents, these challenges can result in the heartbreaking situation of losing regular contact with their grandchildren and being excluded from their lives. Common reasons for this alienation include:


  • Disputes between grandparents and their own children or in-laws.



  • Geographical relocation of the family.


  • A breakdown of trust or communication within the family.



An elderly woman is holding the hand of a young child.

What does New Zealand law say about grandparents' rights?

Even though it is widely recognised how grandparents often play an essential and profound role in the lives of their grandchildren, (continuity, stability, and a unique familial bond), in New Zealand, the legal framework doesn’t automatically grant grandparents the right to see their grandchildren. This is further hindered by only parents or guardians being able to  make an application for a Court Order.


However, the law does provide a pathway for grandparents to apply for contact arrangements through the Family Court. It is essential to obtain legal advice from experienced family lawyers as soon as you recognise there is a potential problem. For example, if you have a relationship with one of the parents, there may be an opportunity to include your contact within their Parenting Agreement/Order. Seeking legal advice prevents issues escalating and gives you guidance on how to navigate the circumstances and decrease distress.


Mediation: an essential first step

Before going to court, mediation is required to try and reach a satisfactory outcome for all parties involved. Family Dispute Resolution (FDR) is a type of mediation designed to promote the core principles of the Care of Children Act 2004:


  • The child's welfare and best interests are the primary consideration in all matters.


  • The child's views should be considered.


  • Decisions affecting the child should be made within a time frame appropriate to the child's sense of time.


  • Parents and guardians are primarily responsible for the child's care, development, and upbringing.


  • Parents, guardians, and others involved in the child's care should consult and cooperate with each other.


  • The child's care, development, and upbringing should be continuous.



  • The child’s identity, including culture, language, and religious denomination and practice should be preserved and strengthened.



A man and a child are walking on the beach at sunset.

How Family Dispute Resolution can help

FDR aims to resolve disputes amicably, enabling agreement without the emotional and financial cost of litigation. Overseen by a qualified mediator often with legal or counselling experience, FDR provides a structured, informal environment to focus on the child’s best interests.


  • Get to the core of the issues between the parties.


  • Facilitate discussions in respect of those matters and consider different options.


  • Help the parties reach an agreement that serves the welfare and best interests of the children.

 

While family lawyers don’t attend FDR sessions, agreements reached through FDR can later be challenged in the Family Court if issues persist. It’s important to note that costs for FDR depend on income. Low-income individuals may qualify for free services, while others may pay for a government-funded mediator. Independent mediators may charge different fees. Weston Ward and Lascelles are family law mediators in Christchurch.


Can grandparents apply for contact through the family court?

If mediation fails, making an application to the Family Court becomes the next step. While it’s a formal process, the Court’s primary concern is always the child’s welfare and adherence to the Care of Children Act 2004. Remember, FDR is a compulsory pre-requisite to making an application, but permission also needs to be sought from the court to apply for contact and a Court Order. At this stage the Court evaluates:


  • The nature of the relationship: how close is the bond between the grandparent and the grandchild?


  • The child’s best interests: does maintaining or re-establishing the relationship benefit the child?



  • Potential harm: would the contact have any negative impact on the child’s well-being?


Once permission is granted, grandparents can file for contact in a Parenting Order. This specifies when and how the grandparent can spend time with their grandchild. Court decisions can vary widely, from granting regular contact to approving one-off visits for special occasions. In some cases, the Court may decide that contact isn’t in the child’s best interest, particularly if the family conflict is severe or ongoing. Your family lawyer in Christchurch will advise you on most likely outcomes before the hearing. 


A family is playing with a soccer ball on the beach.

5 Practical tips for grandparents seeking contact


1.    Communicate openly: reach out to your children or their partners to express your desire to remain involved in your grandchildren’s lives. Frame the conversation around the child’s well-being rather than your own feelings.


2.    Remain neutral: keep focused on the children’s needs and avoid actions or comments that might deepen divisions within the family.


3.    Offer mediation: suggest a neutral meeting facilitated by a trained mediator. This shows you’re committed to finding an amicable solution.


4.    Document your efforts: keep a dated record of your attempts to resolve the situation, including letters, messages, or offers of mediation.



5.    Seek legal advice: grandparent family law advice in New Zealand is crucial for understanding your rights and the best course of action. Weston Ward and Lascelles family law firms in Christchurch have experience in grandparents’ rights and can guide you through the process.


Grandparents' legal rights in a changing landscape

While grandparents in New Zealand don’t have an automatic right to see their grandchildren, societal recognition of their importance is growing. Advocacy for better legal protections is increasing, particularly as the number of blended and separated families continues to rise.


Not seeing your grandchildren can be an isolating and distressing experience, but it’s important to remember that options are available. Whether through mediation or the Family Court, grandparents do successfully regain contact and rebuild meaningful relationships with their grandchildren. The key is to approach the situation calmly, seek expert family law advice, and always prioritise the child’s best interests. By doing so, you increase your chances of reaching a positive outcome that benefits everyone involved.


If you’re a grandparent facing this issue, contact Weston Ward and Lascelles’ Christchurch family lawyers. Understanding your legal rights and taking proactive steps can make all the difference in reuniting with your grandchildren. Our family lawyers are committed and supportive, using their wealth of experience and advocacy supporting clients through family law disputes. Call 03 379 1740 or click here to arrange a confidential, no obligation chat, to see how we can help you. 

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